I don’t want to be “the one who got away”. I used to think that was some person (or people) who you let slip through your fingers.
“They could’ve been the one!”
Hunny, if they were “the one”, they wouldn’t have “gotten away”.
My mom told me today, to paraphrase the old saying,
“people come into your life for a season, for a moment, or for a lifetime.”
Everyone isn’t meant to stay. The sooner we accept this, the sooner we can move on with our lives.
Notice, I didn’t say, “the sooner we can let go.” How can you let go of someone who meant so much to you and had such a deep impact on your life? You can’t. You can accept the absence and continue on with your life. But, you can’t ever let them go. Why? Because we are all connected.
I believe in god–or moreso what I call “gawd”**. Gawd is not the God of the Bible. Gawd, to me, is the divine spirit of the universe. This spirit moves through all of us. When we die, the spirit returns from the flesh realm to the spirit realm until it is time to return back to flesh.
This may not be what you believe. I respect that. Go with me anyway…
Spirit is like air. We breathe air into our lungs, then release it back into the atmosphere. Although you are not breathing the same breath as me, we ARE breathing the same air. Whether I am in Chicago and you are in Jakarta, we are breathing from the same source.
Similarly, the spirit that inhabits my body comes from the same place as the spirit that inhabits your body. And our spirits will return to the same place. We are connected, you and I. So, I can never let you go. You are a part of me.
So, when people say they “let someone go” or “get away”, they are somewhat surrendering to their feelings of loss and actually letting go of hope. If that person was “the one” and they are gone, there is no one else in the entire world for me?
I believe in soul mates:
Souls who come from the same source as my soul and who somehow managed to find my soul and say, “Hey! I missed you!”
These soul mates aren’t meant to stay with me always. They have shit to do. Their job (so to speak) is to guide me along my life path. To help me remember where we come from. To remind me that I’m not alone. When their soul work is done, they leave to give me space to reflect and grow. Sometimes, they come back. Sometimes, they don’t. But, usually they do return… when I really need them.
How many soul mates do I have? It’s hard to say. I believe I’ve had different relationships with each soul in the past, so our soul connections in this lifetime vary. Some of my soul mates are:
1. A soul mate I’ve known for going on 15 years now. No constant contact, but we run into each other and check on each other and the love is always there.
2. A soul mate who doesn’t remember our past life together, and that’s okay.
3. A soul mate who remembers our past life and wants it how it used to be, but it can’t be. (I’ve also been this way.)
4. A soul mate who I linked with on MySpace. (Remember MySpace?!) We’ve been sisters ever since.
5. A soul mate who needs me to be a conductor for the divine messages they ignore sometimes.
6. A soul mate who says and does everything I am not brave enough to do this lifetime.
7. A soul mate who is also my life partner this lifetime. (I married this one! Yay, me!)
My life partner remembers me from a past life, back in ancient Egypt, I believe. We weren’t together then, but we are now. Similarly, there are other soul mates I can’t hold onto now—ex-husband, ex lovers, ex friends—but we may be together in another lifetime.
So, no. I don’t want to be the one who got away. The one who slipped through your fingers. I would rather be the one who had some impact on your life, then disappeared into the ether knowing we would be together again some day…
“I guess I’ll see you next lifetime…”
|*Erykah Badu, “Next Lifetime”
|**Since I don’t identify as Christian, meaning “a follower of Christ”, I usually choose to not capitalize “god” and prefer the spelling “gawd” or refer to it as simply “The Universe”. I recognize a divine higher spirit. I choose not to accept that divine spirit as a male overseer who sent himself as his son to die for our sins that we still need to ask him forgiveness for aka repentance. Again, I respect your religion. Gawd/The Universe fits me.